Skip to main content

The scary side of Crohn's




                           
                    The last thing I remember was being brought into the OR and remembering how cold it was and I heard music in the background. Before you knew it the anesthesiologist came up behind me and put oxygen on. They must have put something in my IV to put me me under because before I knew it, I was out.

                     My first tiny memory I had was when I was being transferred from the operation room to recovery was me singing "Old McDonald had a farm, ei ei o".  I honestly don't know how long it was till I was awake and aware of my surroundings. The first thing I felt was my wife giving me a foot rub. It was amazing. If I could ask anyway to be woken up, this would be it.  On a side note they also had these massage leg massagers to put on your legs to keep my circulation going. See when you are in bed for days on end with hardly any movement, you become susceptible to blood clots. So this massage was one of the ways to avoid getting blood clots. So back to what I was saying, I felt Megan rubbing my feet. At this point is when I start to awake. When I first woke up after feeling this amazing massage I opened my eyes and Megan was at the foot of my bed. She was my first sight. 

                Everything was so scary. I looked over to my left and I remember 2-3 nurses playing with my blood pressure. At the time I didn't know why they all were on my left side. Later I was told that my blood pressure was not good. They were given me medication in my IV to help lower it. The pain hit and it hit hard. I was very loopy which was a good thing. I have a faint memory of this. I am sure if I wasn't all drugged up I would remember everything. I remember asking for another ice pack. The pain was terrible. I knew my surgery was going to be bad, just not how bad it actually was.

             
             My mom and dad came in my room to see me. God they were so worried. I mean I understand why hello their only daughter just had major emergency surgery. I know I had surgery and I shouldn't be worried about others, but I was. See I am my mothers daughter and we have this incredible bond. My father and mother tried to get pregnant for seven years and also losing a pregnancy on top of it. Finally they got pregnant with me, I am their angel baby. So she empaths me hard, as well as I empathize her. So if I am anxious she can feel it vis versa if she is anxious I feel it. I am like that with a lot of people but certain people its a deeper connection. 
           
             I was told that originally my operation was going to be three hours. My mom and Megan explained to me what happened also my surgeon came in and explained what happened. I still ask questions now about it. It's crazy how you can push memories out of the way. It's not really a good thing to do. That can cause mental health problems.  I suffer from PTSD now from surgery. So back to my operation.

         I was told I was in the operation room for five hours. Yes you read it, FIVE. I was instantly shocked when I heard what the surgeon told Megan and my mom. As there information continues to get worse. The surgeon continued to tell them what went on through my surgery. He said it was worse then he suspected. My small intestine and part of my large were extremely inflamed. You know how he told me earlier that I had perforated my intestine ? Well infection was all through me. I had gone septic. So he had to cut the part out that was extremely diseased. He left what was active in there because you want to preserve as much bowel as possible. So he cut me wide open from underneath my chest to just below the pubic bone. In fact some of the scar I have now is on the top of my pubic bone. He took about 11 inches out of my small bowel and a couple centimeters off my large bowel and resected them together. I also had a fistula from my small intestine to my bowel. Now that accounts the pain I felt. Sepsis is scary, definitely nothing to play with. After finding out what happened to me, 

There was a concert playing that night. As the nurses left and I was falling back asleep. Megan and I listened to the Tool. Oh how would I have loved to be there. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Where my Trauma started

             As I laid on the floor, I hope and prayed it wouldn't turn out to be more. As eyes drew heavy and I was so hot. If you could think of how a microwave cooks things from the inside out. That's how I felt. Sweat was just pouring off of me. My wife called 911 as I laid there and rested. She gathered all the cats, so that they wouldn't run outside. They would of have let them out by the way they treated me as an human that was a child. I was laying on the floor as my mom came in. At this point the ambulance people are ready to show up. My mom was waving me down with a fan, the one she made out of a book. She fell to her knees when she got here. If you could have only see that look. It was like the strength of my families life just drain from them. The more sick I felt the more I drained their soul.  The paramedics are horrible. They didn't help me to the stretcher, they also didn't want me to put my sandal on. I was told I would be ...

Sepsis is nothing to mess with

                                   When I awoke from my surgery, I had no idea that I had been in surgery for 4 hours.  Finding out after having surgery that you were septic is frightening. You can die from sepsis. When my small bowel perforated I never thought about getting sepsis all through me. I knew it could happen but I was so drugged up that it was a blur.  My surgeon had really no idea how septic I was till he was opening me up.                                      I was in so much pain I and so messed up that when I woke up it was better we didn't talk much to the infection. It was a scary place mentally to be because you have no control of your body. I noticed I had these tubes on the left and right abdomen. At the end of the tube is almost shaped like a light bulb. When I looked a...

This is my life

                You would think it was uncanny how the world shatters when one vibration is off in our universe. How everything falls apart at the drop of a dime. Chaos every corner you go around and everything starts to slow down. Time doesn't seem consistent everything starts to go distant. By the time that time starts to come back everything till then will be off kilter and everything will be out of whack. I cant stand parallel to myself all the time. Three two one everything has come undone. Now it's almost time again.                This viscous portal of darkness you are not aloud here messing with us. It is a touchy feely subject. Most of all of this is fucked up. Is this portal to the parallel life something we should even know. I pull my divine crystals out and mediate and even push the bad out. Things start to rise one by one. It is when I start to rise again then so do others. ...