There For I Have Awakend

I had opened my eyes from a short nap in the morning. Early in the morning CNAs would  come in and do vitals and then surgeon/doctor would come in to evaluate me. He would also check my wound. At this point I had not really seen what had been done. I had seen tubes coming out every orfus and I think we didn't touch the bandage right away.     This particular morning I was again woken up around 7:00am. At first CNA were coming into more often then not. At some points I was the only person critical at the hospital. The nurse would come in the morning to give out medications and also check bandages if they needed to be changed. I would also get my morning Heparin shot. Oh man the Heparin burned. They had to put it in my thigh and every time I got one they would  change sides. They also left this awful bruises and lumps behind. The Heparin shot was like fire. I had never really been a big fan of shots  so this was big for me. When you are on bed rest they...

                                   When I awoke from my surgery, I had no idea that I had been in surgery for 4 hours.  Finding out after having surgery that you were septic is frightening. You can die from sepsis. When my small bowel perforated I never thought about getting sepsis all through me. I knew it could happen but I was so drugged up that it was a blur.  My surgeon had really no idea how septic I was till he was opening me up.                                      I was in so much pain I and so messed up that when I woke up it was better we didn't talk much to the infection. It was a scary place mentally to be because you have no control of your body. I noticed I had these tubes on the left and right abdomen. At the end of the tube is almost shaped like a light bulb. When I looked a...

                            When I was in high school we had an option to go to the United Technology Center. The United Technology Center is a vocational school. A vocational school is learning skills you could use to get a job. For example they had a year course to become a CNA or get a certificate for Culinary Arts. There were more to offer like computers and vehicles. They were big courses and you got 3 credits per a class. When you're young and an opportunity comes along like this you grab it. So I grabbed it and I felt good about it too. The first year I went to become a CNA. I would learn all the facts of the trade. There is  important material I needed to learn in order to pass the test at the end of the year. I have some stories I will tell at later times about being a CNA and what that brought on.  In the CNA course you get taught how to give sponge baths to those who are bedridden or people s...

                       Ever since I remember I have hated needles. I remember as a small child running away from the doctor when I needed shots. I mean one appointment I hide under the chairs and cried. So that's how i have always felt.                         I have had piercings & tattoos done in the past. I am always so nervous about the pinch and the pain of the needle. Sometimes it was a pinch of pain like when I got my nose piercing. It was a pretty big needle but it was so quick and rewarding for me. The first piercing was when I was a teenager. My mother brought me to the tattoo shop and I wanted to get my belly button pierced. At this moment it was all new and I didn't know if it would hurt like a shot. So basically I was scared shitless. I wanted the piercing so bad I was ready for the pinch. It was scary and my adrenaline was going all ove...

                     I was in and out of sleep.I had awaken or that's what I thought. I heard a voice say " Breanna...Bre what is our presidents name" I had to think of course and I said "He's not my president." Again the voice asked again what our presidents name was and I was still groggy and said "He's not my president" Well the lady I heard realized it was not a good question to ask. So then she asked me what was his hair color. I knew what it was but I said grey. That is all I heard as I drifted off back to sleep. Ativan , so much ativan. I've never had such a alluring drug. I know it's habit forming so I am glad I was only prescribed it in hospital setting. I was so distressed and I was having a hard time comprehending what really happened to me. I could hear everything going on around me. I couldn't focus on just one thing. I was drowsy to say the least.                   ...