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Then there was this



             I am sitting there and hoping with all my might that I wouldn't throw up. Since throwing up was a scary part of my past time. When I was little I would always try as hard as I  could to not puke. Did it work ? No. Good try though right. I was told I had a partial blockage. I had only a little idea what they were talking about. In the past I swear I have had a partial blockage a few times in the past. One example was when Megan and I were visiting her family in Illinois. We had been visiting a few years before this. We took a bus and traveled to see her mom, stepfather, and sister. I always seemed to be really sick when I traveled. I would have to sleep, sleep, and sleep. Then I still felt terrible. The food is different. So although it was so yummy but belly was not used to it. So lets back it up to this night where I believed to have a partial blockage. We had gone to bed at a pretty late time. Megan and I had fell asleep. Then like my usual I woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. As soon as I woke up I felt like I had a rock in my stomach and I felt nauseated. I had never really felt that type of feeling in my stomach. I went right back to my fear of vomiting. I thought something serious was wrong but prior to that I had never had these symptoms. When you have a partial blockage you can not pass gas or stool. Now stool can still come out. When you get a blockage you can still go to the bathroom. There is left over feces inside your bowel. So even though you can't pass anyone pass the blockage there is still sometimes stuff to still pass. I tried and tried to go to the bathroom. I continued to feel nauseated and the second time I went in the bathroom I definitely vomited. I had the worse stomach pains come and go and my stomach was heavy as well. I was lucky nothing serious happened because of the partial blockage. 

        Now lets fast forward to back when I was in the hospital recently. I was told that I had a partial blockage. Anytime I have been in the hospital in the past I just got IV and pain meds. I was told I can no longer have anything to eat or drink. My heart dropped and my anxiety started to get worse, I was so scared! They walked me into a room and had Megan and my mom go into a different room. There was the nurse I had from the ER, so I was even more nervous. She had been super rough with me, so I was worried. So my old nurse and a newer nurse came in and were putting an ng tube down my throat into my belly. They use Ng to suck out your stomach contents so they can give it a chance to pass the partial blockage. The fear of the unknown my friends. I was SO scared. My old nurse told me that she knows how bad they are and she is good at it because she knew she would want hers put in genitally. So I took a deep breathe. Then I stopped and looked up frightened and cried some more. The at the time my new assigned Dr came in. She had planned to put the NG tube in and wait till Monday to see if I needed surgery. When they told me it might pass, I held on to their word. All I got out of that was "It might pass". I had to talk to my surgeon/ doctor a little bit before I had the NG tube put in. So I couldn't put it off anymore. I had to suck it up and just do it.

        How do you become so strong so fast. "Swallow, swallow, swallow!" Said the nurses. Oh that long hard tube. There is not much give to it and it's so uncomfortable when it lays in the back of your throat. At the end of getting the tube in I puked just a little. I gagged so hard. I had tears in my eyes and I was shaking. I wanted Megan and my mom SO badly. I didn't understand why they couldn't be in there. I understood to a degree but I did it anyway. I guess you look back and I don't think tragedy is good for others to see. Who wants to see their daughter or wife have a tube shoved down my throat. 

       They have to tape it to your nose and it's terrible. It's an awful tape and it doesn't like to stick. After that was all said in done we had my wife and mom come back into the room.

To be continued..

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